A Canadian who likes motorcycles, butts, traveling. And some other stuff. Follow my Instagram -lonegypsywolf / NSFW

 

I think the saddest people always try their hardest to make people happy

because they know what it’s like to feel absolutely worthless

and they don’t want anyone else to feel like that.

Robin Williams (via skateeofmind)

mizzjade:

strangexxxunusual:

herkindoftea:

This is all wonderful, but my goodness that porch is dreamy.

Goals.

The books. Y’all… the books.

(Source: ourinvinciblesummer)

tobiasxva:

tyleroakley:

THESE ARE ALL FLAWFREE

"Flawfree"? The word is "flawless"

Also of course they’re good, the point of this game is leaving it up to chance. When you can flip through the deck and make the best combos and take pictures of it, the allure is gone.

(Source: buzzfeed)

One: Buy condoms. Buy them and keep them with you at all times, and use them before you are asked to use them. And use them every time. The peace of mind you allow your partner will free her to be vulnerable with you, and that, my son, is exactly what sex is about. Condoms are sexy. In fact, call buying condoms foreplay.
(Footnote: If you are too embarrassed to buy condoms, you are not ready to have sex.)

Two: Kissing is not merely foreplay. Spend entire evenings making out on the couch while fully clothed. Believe me, dry-humping rocks.

Three: Sex is not just about friction. It’s about emotion. Stop trying to find her clitoris and find her heart. Because then she’ll help you find her clitoris.

Four: If you really wanna know how to please a woman, ask her how she masturbates. Then do that. A lot. If she claims she doesn’t masturbate, offer to take her shopping for a vibrator so you can both learn the vocabulary of her body together.

Five: Don’t put anything in her butthole you wouldn’t want in your own.
(Footnote: Try a pinky finger, it’s kinda awesome.)

Six: When you go down on her—and you will go down on her, and if you are my son, you will be amazing at it—tell her how good she tastes. Stop in the middle and kiss her deeply so she knows how good she tastes. Do the same when she goes down on you.

Seven: A simple Google search will yield 1,327 euphemisms for male masturbation, yet only 23 for female masturbation. If guys spent less time jacking off and more time jilling off, this world would be a happier place.

Eight: Everything you need to know about the importance of the clitoris is in the movie Star Wars. You are Luke Skywalker piloting your penis-shaped X-Wing Fighter deep inside her trench. Remember: seventy percent of all Death Stars cannot be blown up through penetration of the trench alone. It must be through focused contact with that little exhaust port at the top of the trench. Otherwise, any explosions you experience will be merely Hollywood special effects.

Nine: Just because you come doesn’t mean she has, so don’t you dare come before her. Focus completely on your partner. Don’t worry about gettin’ yours, you’re a guy. You always get yours. Your job is to make sure she’s gettin’ hers.

Ten: If sex with your partner lasts no longer than this poem, you are not making love. You are masturbating with her body instead of your hand. Shame on you. Go back to step one. You’ve got a lot of learning to do.
Love, Dad.

Big Poppa E., “How To Make Love”  (via punkrockmermaid)

(Source: slambien)

lion-eyes03:

IF HER BRA MATCHES HER PANTIES THEN CONGRATS YOU’RE GETTING LAID

So wrong…. 1 you plan it 2 spare of the moment. I rarely wear underwear when i know I’m hanging with a cute guy that I have plan to fuck.. Only time I have matching stuff is when my photo is being taken